going to borders have allowed me to come in contact with some interesting people.  allow me to introduce to you the

Dramatis Personae

crazy barista girl: played by 20 year old something who admits she is "alot to handle".  things i have observed while in her midst, non stop incessant chatter about how cool she is and she can out drink most guys (which is apparently why she is lacking a significant other at the moment according to her).  She also hopes to be as skinny as an anorexic and restrain from sleep so she can obtain deep purple bags under her eyes in order to appear more "emo/goth."

Stole the Scene Moment:  this girl deserves two.  scene one: she called over the manager to tell him how wonderful a barista she is and her grand plans to move up to work up being a cashier for borders.  she also tells him that her crazy personality wins over many customers and she can sell basically anything, at which point she picks up the nearest trash receptacle and tries to sell the manager on its many purposeful qualities. 

scene two: proving that working the cash register has become too difficult for her she proceeds to give out free coffee's and teas claiming that the machine is broken. ( i scored one hot passion fruit tea).

excessively talkative study partner girl sitting next to me:  slightly plumber then her counterpart she looks strikingly similar to a childhood favorite of mine, miss. piggy.  while this girl lacks her kermit and miss. piggy's pizazz, she continues on a mile long word tyraid about how many boys she has had the "opportunity" to date and what she would do had she actually gone out on a date with them.  This girl claimed to be 19.

stole the scene moment: where she talks about her sexual education class in high school and how she regrets not being taught how to put on a condom (apparently her mother would not allow her to take part in the demonstration)

well folks there is more to come, but for know ill leave you with another picture

this was me in my apartment in mexico.  apparently i was laughing in a drunken stupor.  i was very excited that day because soon, very soon i would see the love of my life.  immediately after the picture i felt sick and had to be carried to bed to sleep off the chupitos.

see, i keep thinking he'll fight for me, he'll come back for me.  but its just not true.  if i dont hold onto this relationship no one will.  im just tired of being the one that always calls first, even though im the one that is always left out, always uninvited.  i keep hoping for change but it never seems to reach me. i keep hoping for change so i can believe again.  so i can go back. 

oh and if any of you were wondering... lies still happen on both ends. it seems none are too big or too small.

 im going to upload a picture from a while back 

this is me on one of my first days in australia. i remember being keenly aware that i was very much alone in a different country.  i remember feeling hope, i remember being optomistic, and i remembered that i kept having to remind myself i had no friends there, i had to begin to rely on myself, it was scary but turned out to be very true there, at least for that time in my life.  also i remember it being very hotand i wore my shades because i even though i knew i didnt have an "in case of an emergency" person over there, i kept looking out in the city for him that day.  hoping...  

Currently Listening Songs in the Key of Life By Stevie Wonder see related

so i am updating.  for a while i feel i lost purpose with the xanga. coming back is a little bit duanting and even more so about trying to bet connected back from being disconnected.  i dont feel quite there yet but i am getting closer.  so many things unfolded on my travels, no where near the amount that i told on my xanga and creates that sense of change within me.  i feel like i have become a new person but without realizing it and now that i am back have to reaquiant myself with....well..myself.  but its all about that when you come back isnt it

readjusitng

revisiting

retelling

responding

reevaluting

and reworking

My life has entered the re-stage at the moment.  but thats not whats bothering me, whats bothering me is that i feel at this stage i am disappointing my friends.  I dont know what else to say but that i just dont feel like a good friend. I am missing out on important things because of this re- or that re- thing that is pressing me in my life.  i am sorry guys.  but thank you to my friends that have welcomed me back to the states with such warm enthusiasm.  you know, i kinda thought that you guys would have forgotten all about me and it was the most beautiful feelings to see how far from the truth that was. 

p.s. I am so sorry i missed your birthday because of my travels.  i promise i will make it up to you.  you five make up all my heart and it hurts to know that i could not be there for that fifth piece of my heart. 

Currently Reading Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (Book 6) By J.K. Rowling see related

hahaha! blind times in australia!

these are some quotes that i would like to dedicate and just because when i look back, i wont to remember the stupid things we would say! lol

1. "lets go check on techno mouse"

"he's freakin out man! we had 3 grams of speed and two microdots.  Quick, put him in the ambient hutch"

2. "you lazy slut!"

3. "who was it?"

"THE INDIANS"

"freakin indians"

4. "infact, Gob had not delievered the letter but in an act of defiance through it into the sea"

5." look man, she's really a nice girl"--as  two australians load a drunken joey into the shopping trolley after getting sick on campbell's best friend and push me back home !

6. "stupid seppos"

7. "excuse her, she's american"

9. "what happened to the goose"--dedicated to the greater union movie dancers

Currently Playing Monkey Business By Black Eyed Peas bepot see related